Week 1: Building an Inclusive Foundation - Listening With Intent and Using Inclusive Language
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Creating a culture of inclusion starts with our everyday interactions. While broad social changes are essential, inclusion is most impactful when it’s woven into how we communicate and connect with one another. Two simple yet powerful practices—listening with intent and using inclusive language—are foundational to fostering inclusivity. This week, we’ll explore ways to strengthen our listening skills and practice mindful language that invites others to feel welcome and valued.
Listening With Intent
Listening is more than just hearing words; it’s an active process that involves giving full attention, empathy, and understanding to the speaker. Intentional listening is crucial, especially when we’re engaging with someone from a different background or life experience. Here are some ways to practice this form of listening:
Maintain Eye Contact and Positive Body Language
When someone is speaking, show that you’re fully present by maintaining eye contact, nodding occasionally, and leaning slightly forward. These nonverbal cues demonstrate engagement and attentiveness, helping the speaker feel valued.
Example: Imagine you’re in a conversation with a coworker sharing their personal experiences with accessibility challenges. By maintaining eye contact, avoiding distractions, and showing interest, you’re communicating that their story matters.
Resist the Urge to Interject or Offer Solutions
Often, we’re quick to jump in with advice or relate the topic to our own experiences. But intentional listening means giving the speaker space to fully express themselves without interruption or redirection.
Example: When a friend from a marginalized group shares frustrations about societal challenges, resist the urge to offer solutions or shift to your own perspective. Instead, affirm their feelings with responses like, “I appreciate you sharing that with me,” or “That sounds really challenging.”
Ask Open-Ended Questions
If appropriate, ask open-ended questions that encourage the person to expand on their thoughts. This helps deepen the conversation and shows genuine interest.
Example: If a colleague mentions feeling overlooked in team meetings, you might ask, “How does that affect your experience here?” or “What could make these meetings more inclusive for you?” These questions allow the person to share more, which can help you understand their perspective better.
Practice Reflective Listening
After someone shares their thoughts, summarize or paraphrase what they said to confirm your understanding. This reinforces that you’ve truly heard them and gives them a chance to clarify if needed.
Example: If a friend tells you about an experience with discrimination, you could respond, “It sounds like that made you feel excluded and unseen.” Reflective listening like this acknowledges their experience and shows empathy.
Daily Tip: During conversations this week, practice listening without mentally preparing your response. Focus solely on the speaker’s words and, if needed, pause for a moment before responding.
Using Inclusive Language
Language is one of the most impactful tools we have for fostering inclusivity. Words shape our perceptions and signal respect—or lack thereof—for others. Small adjustments in our everyday language can show others that we respect their identity and experiences. Here’s how to make inclusive language a natural part of your conversations:
Use Gender-Neutral Terms
Avoid gendered terms like “guys” or “ladies and gentlemen” when addressing groups. Instead, use terms like “everyone,” “folks,” or “team.” This simple change prevents assumptions about gender and makes everyone feel included.
Example: In a meeting, instead of saying, “Hi guys, let’s get started,” try saying, “Hi everyone, let’s begin.” This shift respects the diversity of identities in the room.
Avoid Making Assumptions About Relationships
Instead of assuming someone’s relationship status, use terms like “partner” or “significant other” unless the person specifies otherwise. This acknowledges different types of relationships and avoids excluding those who may not fit traditional relationship norms.
Example: If you’re asking about someone’s weekend plans, say, “Are you and your partner doing anything fun?” rather than “Are you and your husband/wife...?” This neutral phrasing makes it clear that you’re open to all types of relationships.
Ask for and Use Preferred Pronouns
Whenever possible, ask people their pronouns and make an effort to use them. Respecting pronouns is a meaningful way to honor someone’s identity.
Example: During introductions in a group setting, you can say, “Hi, I’m [Your Name] and I use she/her pronouns. Feel free to share your pronouns if you’d like.” Modeling this can make others feel comfortable sharing their pronouns.
Use Language That Honors People’s Identities
Be mindful of terms that relate to people’s race, ethnicity, or cultural background. If you’re unsure of the correct terminology, respectfully ask or do a bit of research to ensure you’re using language that is current and respectful.
Example: If you’re referring to someone’s background, ask about their preferred terms. For instance, someone may prefer to be identified as Latino, Hispanic, or by their specific nationality, like Mexican or Colombian. Using the correct terms shows respect and attentiveness.
Practice Active Correction
If you slip up or use an incorrect term or pronoun, correct yourself, apologize briefly, and move on. Acknowledging the mistake without dwelling on it shows respect and a willingness to improve.
Example: If you mistakenly use “he” instead of “they” for someone who uses they/them pronouns, simply say, “Sorry, they,” and continue the conversation. This brief correction shows that you’re making an effort to respect their identity.
Daily Tip: Pay attention to your language, especially in group settings. Practicing inclusive language may take time, but these small shifts help create a more welcoming environment.
Weekly Challenge
This week, focus on two practices:
Practice Intentional Listening: Choose one conversation each day where you prioritize listening over speaking. Try to go the entire conversation without interrupting, offering solutions, or relating the conversation back to your own experience.
Use Inclusive Language: Consciously use gender-neutral language, and avoid assumptions about people’s relationships or identities. Notice how this shift affects the flow of your conversations and the responses you receive.
Reflection Prompt: At the end of the week, reflect on how practicing these habits impacted your interactions. Did people seem more open? Did you notice any changes in how you approached conversations? Reflecting on these questions can help reinforce these habits as part of your everyday practice of inclusion.
By committing to intentional listening and inclusive language this week, we’re taking small but powerful steps toward building a culture of respect and belonging. Inclusion starts with us—one conversation at a time.
